Suppression Across Generations - Angela Stewart - Afro Hair Coach and Makeup Artist - #239

Embracing Cultural Heritage and Finding Identity: A Conversation with Angela Stewart

In this episode of the Us People Podcast, host Savia Rocks kicks off season five with a focus on creativity through diversity.

The guest, Angela Stewart, an Afro hair coach and makeup artist, shares her journey of self-discovery, her complex relationship with hair care, and her efforts to educate others about the cultural and mental significance of natural hair. Through candid conversation, she unpacks her upbringing in a religious family with Caribbean roots, and the transition from traditional beliefs to accepting her Buddhist values.

Angela discusses her passion for natural hair care and its historical context, emphasizing the importance of understanding and embracing one's heritage.

Throughout the episode, she highlights how personal growth influenced her parenting and professional life, viewing her past challenges as learning experiences.

00:00 Welcome to Season Five
01:14 Introducing Angela Stewart
03:54 Angela's Background and Heritage
06:28 Challenges and Triumphs
18:31 Personal Growth and Family Impact
26:59 The Journey to Self-Acceptance
39:12 The Importance of Hair Culture
44:13 The Importance of Hair Care
45:01 The Impact of Hair Products
47:17 Mental Health and Hair Perception
49:31 Personal Stories and Experiences
52:20 The Versatility of Afro Hair
59:02 Makeup as an Art Form
01:05:03 Self-Reflection and Personal Growth
01:17:51 Final Thoughts and Farewell

Thank you so much Angela for showing us, that we all heal in different ways, and you are not defined by your past.

Website: https://afrohaircoach.com/about/

Suppression Across Generations is something that we all can learn to heal from, but make a change, so we to don't become the same as past generations - Savia Rocks

Transcript

Suppression Across Generations - Angela Stewart - #239

[00:00:00] Savia Rocks: Hey guys, we made it to season five of the Us people podcast. I'm your host Savia rocks. And in this season, we aim to empower and embrace creativity through diversity. As we dive into the fascinating stories and experiences of a diverse range of individuals, highlighting their unique perspectives and creative endeavors.

[00:00:20] From artists and entrepreneurs to innovators and activists, we celebrate the power of diversity in driving creativity and fostering positive change. Join us as we engage in thought provoking conversations like 

[00:00:37] Tony DaDa: I made myself intentionally homeless in pursuit of my purpose. 

[00:00:41] Jay Harris: We're aware that. A lot of people want to present and they, and they were in my position and what's worse, they weren't a white male, which is a joke that that's even still a thing.

[00:00:49] Mel: I think my family never, ever say you can't do something. So full of support, full of support for whatever dream. If I said tomorrow when I fly to the moon, they'll probably say, I wish you all the best Mel. 

[00:00:59] Savia Rocks: So [00:01:00] guys, I just want to say thank you for supporting the Us People podcast for the past five years.

[00:01:06] And we look forward to sharing another new theme song. Let's go. 

[00:01:14] Angela Stewart: Hi, my name is Angela and I am an Afro hair coach and a makeup artist. You're listening to Us People Podcast with 

[00:01:24] Intro Music: Savia Rocks.

[00:01:34] Savia Rocks: Hey guys, welcome to another episode of the Us People Podcast. I'm your host Savia Rocks and today I'm I am abundantly humbled to have Angela Stewart here with me, who is a makeup artist for TV and films and our Afro hair care coach. So this is something that I love because my big hair needs some care from time to time.

[00:01:54] So it is nice to have someone on the show who [00:02:00] understands the depth of, of, I'm sure we're going to talk about many subjects and I'm just excited to have someone who is an educator on this. So. Angela, thank you so much for taking your time to come on the Ask People show. How are you? 

[00:02:14] Angela Stewart: I am really good, thank you.

[00:02:15] Um, I am feeling a little bit, um, I won't say overwhelmed, but I'm just like so humbled that you even asked me because I listened to your podcast and I'm like, what, me? Oh, so yeah, I'm, I'm really good and at the moment I'm feeling truly blessed. Thank you for having 

[00:02:35] Savia Rocks: me. You're more than welcome. One thing I always say to people, it's, it's about people's stories.

[00:02:41] Um, nobody is higher than another person. I believe in the world and I think sometimes we can get consumed by who a person is or what they do sometimes. And for me, I just see everyone as an equal person, even me, even me. When I, when I go out, Just as an equal, [00:03:00] humble person. I don't mind people bumping, bumping into me.

[00:03:04] I prefer life like that to be quite fair. Yeah. I find privacy such an important factor in my life. And for my family, as I'm sure you do as well in what you do. So thank you for coming on the show. Without people like yourself, I wouldn't have a show. 

[00:03:20] Angela Stewart: You're very welcome. 

[00:03:22] Savia Rocks: Cool. This is cool. So Angela, my first question for you is, could you define privacy?

[00:03:28] who you are as a person, but also your background and how that influenced you to be the person who you are today. 

[00:03:40] Angela Stewart: That is a really deep and broad question. It 

[00:03:44] Savia Rocks: is. Oh, 

[00:03:46] Angela Stewart: okay. You may have to remind me of points That's 'cause I might Well, that's fine. Wander up onto a tangent. , I met you. You got me right? Yeah.

[00:03:53] Okay, cool. Okay, so first of all, who I am as a person? Well, um, [00:04:00] oh, okay. Well, I guess the, the first way to start answering that is probably to. List a bit of my heritage because that kind of pinpoints my background a little yeah I am One in London, in the 60s, from parents who came from the Caribbean islands.

[00:04:25] One was from Barbados, the other's from St. Lucia. Yay. Oh, is this another conversation? St. 

[00:04:32] Savia Rocks: Lucia side, yeah, definitely. 

[00:04:34] Angela Stewart: All right, well, there we go. Um, now my parents, um, were, uh, they had converted from the Caribbean. being Catholics to being Seventh day Adventist. 

[00:04:47] Savia Rocks: Oh. 

[00:04:48] Angela Stewart: So when I was born, they were Seventh day Adventist.

[00:04:50] I grew up in, uh, North London, in Stoke Newington. 

[00:04:55] Savia Rocks: Yeah, I know there. 

[00:04:56] Angela Stewart: In a, uh, [00:05:00] religious environment. The Seventh day Adventist religion, um, mirrors, I guess, that of the Jewish religion. Yes. And so every, uh, Friday evening, depending on sunset, we shut off all our electrical stuff. 

[00:05:17] Intro Music: Yes. 

[00:05:17] Angela Stewart: Um, and Saturday evening, when the sun set.

[00:05:21] We, uh, celebrated if you like the end of the day and got ready for the new week. 

[00:05:27] Savia Rocks: I like that. Yeah, 

[00:05:28] Angela Stewart: like back to normal pretty much. Um, now that religion, um, had no problems with it really as far as religions go. Um, but my father, he, Who also became a pastor later on like he he created his own church Like I feel like a splinter because he didn't quite agree with everything that was being taught.

[00:05:55] So Of course family we went with him. So I [00:06:00] had if you like an institutionalized Restricted, um, suppressed, oppressed, religious background, um, being in the church, to taking a sidestep, being told effectively that everything that I was taught, trained, and educated in is now somehow wrong, which now that I'm talking to you about it, I realize how that can be quite confusing.

[00:06:28] I was in my I was in my, um, I'd say my early teens when my father came out of the church and, uh, hell, I had, excuse my language, I had, um, uh, puberty, I had, um, childhood traumas. Um, aside from the religion and then I had childhood traumas of the religion because in your head you're trying to make sure that you don't go to hell, 

[00:06:57] Savia Rocks: you 

[00:06:58] Angela Stewart: know, and, and, oh [00:07:00] dear, I said, for example, a bad word or I thought evil of somebody else or, you know, there's all of this going on.

[00:07:07] And then I also have, um, my father, um, changing effectively religions, um, which made me think, well, does none of this actually matter, you know? Um, so all of that going on, um, and, uh, then the bit that developed me into an Afro hair coach, I guess, or, or changed my viewpoint on hair. Yeah. 

[00:07:36] Savia Rocks: Yeah. 

[00:07:37] Angela Stewart: Part of my, my childhood traumas meant that although I came from a very large family, I was essentially alone.

[00:07:45] Um, and on top of that, I, I couldn't, my mother, in this large family, there were just two girls, one, me being one of them, obviously. Um, and I couldn't understand why my mother [00:08:00] had such difficulty with my hair. Um, all I knew as a child growing up was that it hurt. And I just assumed that she didn't like me because we, of course, in, in a, um, the black environment, you also have colorism.

[00:08:16] Yeah. That is very true. To explain, to explain to 

[00:08:19] Savia Rocks: you about this all day. 

[00:08:21] Angela Stewart: Oh yeah. 

[00:08:22] Savia Rocks: Mmm. 

[00:08:23] Angela Stewart: Within my family unit, we have the lighter people and we had the darker people. My mother and most of my siblings were lighter skinned. Yeah. And my father was darker skinned and I took more after him. Exactly the same. So that's the skin, nevermind the hair texture.

[00:08:39] Yeah. My, my sister had more of my mother's hair texture. It's still. Yeah. Yeah. pretty much Afro in description, but the curls were not as tight. So when it came to washing it and combing it out, it was easier. Whereas mine was, as they term it nowadays, 4C was the tightest curl. And when you [00:09:00] have a parent who washes it, like I grew up now, we're talking seventies, when you have a parent who follows the, Um, the silver, what's it called?

[00:09:11] Silver crin, or was it Voseen adverts? Um, you're probably too young to even know this, but it's beautiful. I'm not that far off you. 

[00:09:19] Savia Rocks: Oh 

[00:09:19] Angela Stewart: really? Yeah. Oh, that's another conversation we're gonna have.

[00:09:25] Oh my, we have so much to talk about. Yeah. Um, so the advert was this beautiful, dead straight, blonde hair and you'd see her happily doing these great big circular motions in washing it in slow motion and then in rinsing it it fell flat and straight and whatever and then you'd condition it and you should be combing it out.

[00:09:45] Now I don't know whether my mom was influenced by that or whether it was her own experiences of having afro hair and you know, Again, to go back further, which will explain why I developed the training [00:10:00] method that I have or my understanding. My mom's mom was from Panama. Her hair was, if anything, wavy.

[00:10:09] And I remember meeting her once as a four year old, it was, it was wavy. It wasn't Afro in any shape or form. And my mom. Of all of her siblings had the curliest hair. So maybe it was my mother's experience of, well, this is what you have to do. You just got to get through it was why I had my experience of, you know, suck it up, cry if you want, get your knuckles wrapped with the comb, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera.

[00:10:35] So in having my somewhat isolated experience. My mind was able to wonder well, why was this? 

[00:10:44] Savia Rocks: Yeah, 

[00:10:45] Angela Stewart: and as soon as I could I can't miss this one bit out because by no means did I stop crying because I grew up I stopped crying because my mom had to go back to Barbados and she left me to a [00:11:00] neighbor To do my hair now as a six year old or somewhere thereabouts.

[00:11:06] I couldn't have her see me crying, so I stopped crying at that point, but you know, I can't sort of like say yes, you know, I, I magically became this wonderful person, but no circumstances and source universe, whatever, put a situation in my way that I had to deal with it as myself as a, as a young child, I guess.

[00:11:31] Um, and from there, I did my own hair successfully, taught myself how to plait again in this isolated environment where I didn't have really any contact with my siblings in my home unless I felt marginalized or picked on or something. And then we had summer school, which, you know, again, you've sort of like being shifted off and in a large.

[00:11:59] family, you don't [00:12:00] have, um, I don't know, you just feel as though you're a burden, as though I felt as though, just looking at the bigger picture now, I felt as though we were poor, I felt as though we were, um, had to work hard, I felt as though we shouldn't complain, I felt as though we can't talk to other people outside the house, you know, all of these rules, restrictions, and 

[00:12:24] Savia Rocks: It's like being suppressed in your own body.

[00:12:27] Angela Stewart: And squeezed into nothingness. So I felt, above all, insignificant. Above all. And that's so 

[00:12:34] Savia Rocks: far from the truth. 

[00:12:37] Angela Stewart: Well. It is. You're 100 percent right. 

[00:12:40] Savia Rocks: It's so far from the truth. I find that a lot of people, especially in cultures, I remember, it's funny that you tell that story because I remember my mother actually perming my hair because she's got Indian hair.

[00:12:53] So Indian hair is long and straight, right? It's long and straight, like there's not one curl in sight, nothing at all, nothing [00:13:00] at all. I'm half Indian and half black. So I took, I took more of my dad's side where his thickness is thick. Yes, my hair is soft, 

[00:13:10] Angela Stewart: really 

[00:13:10] Savia Rocks: soft, 

[00:13:11] Angela Stewart: but it was still curly. 

[00:13:12] Savia Rocks: It was still curly and it was still painful to me.

[00:13:20] I literally felt every tug and pull and every time I tried to touch my hair, it's true. Your hands will get smacked with the cone. Yep. Yeah. So you 

[00:13:30] Angela Stewart: get labeled with being tender headed as though you're meant to disassociate is a really good word. You're yourself from your skin, from your hair. 

[00:13:40] Savia Rocks: Yeah. So, and, and it was, there was a point where she put my hair and then she burnt my hair Oh, she did it herself.

[00:13:47] Yeah. And like, yeah. See the face. Yeah. And she, she burnt like still tender to this day because, and I always say to, to like try and stay [00:14:00] away from any of those chemicals. And that's why I decided to go natural. Whereas my hair was constantly always straight. And I think that I was trying to fit in with society and then, you know, Praise, you know, the universe for bringing me a partner that said, leave your hair as it is.

[00:14:19] It's beautiful as it is. And then I, that imposter syndrome to do with my hair left, and I haven't looked back since. And for you, I just feel like you were compressed into A small, everything was compressed into a small box and you had to shut that box even with a large majority of your personality within it because your hair represents a massive part of your personality as well as the way you dress, as well as the way you speak more than anything, your personality.

[00:14:56] So I can only imagine you being. [00:15:00] And, and when you're younger, I was taught that, you know, you develop your personality from a certain age to a certain age, you know, and that defines you. So for you having to suppress that would have been really hard for you. 

[00:15:16] Angela Stewart: It was. Um, it was. As a teenager, I felt I needed to be really bullshit.

[00:15:25] Like really in people's faces. I had to be bigger than I was. Um, I had to put up a shield where I would be, you know, pushing them away before they would even try and get close. Um, I had to, it's like a puffer fish. I was like this. I had spikes, you know, I admired, could never do it because of my father's religion.

[00:15:50] I had to, um, I admired punks. I admired, you know, I admired, you know, anyone that, you know, biker jackets, love motorbikes. But I think it's because [00:16:00] I felt they personified what I wanted to be, like someone who didn't care what anyone else said. Somebody who was brave enough to do other things because they weren't waiting for someone else to give them permission.

[00:16:13] Savia Rocks: Yeah. 

[00:16:14] Angela Stewart: Well, I also understood that they were people who went way the other way on the pendulum just to make their point. And I felt that that was unnecessary. Yeah. A very individual person for sure. Um, I think up until

[00:16:35] my first act of rebellion against that was when I was 49. Right. So that goes to show how much, even as much as I developed my, like you say, my, my dress is very unique. I, from a teenager at college, I would deliberately By closing the sale, I didn't want to wear what everybody else was wearing, and that's still me to some degree, but it was only [00:17:00] when I was 49 that I decided, well, you know, I've always wanted to do this.

[00:17:03] I don't have parents now telling me no, I don't have a religion that I believe in, in terms of restriction. Um, I believe in, Energy, I believe in, um, I guess it's, it's to be able to describe in a nutshell, I believe more in the Buddhist type of, um, connectivity with the world and oneself. 

[00:17:29] Savia Rocks: That's why, 

[00:17:30] Angela Stewart: uh, well, that will explain a lot, um, and, uh, I, uh, yeah, I realized that, um, If I was going to do it, it was on me for responsibility.

[00:17:47] And there's nothing 

[00:17:47] Savia Rocks: wrong with you. There's nothing wrong with you doing it. I'm, I'm, I'm surprised that you didn't do it at a younger age. Even though I always say to people, there is no perfect time to do it. The [00:18:00] main thing is that you go out and do it and you find your happiness and doing it. You could be, you could be 10 years old.

[00:18:06] You could be 30 years old. You could be, you could be 80. I know some people who've done. Started businesses at like 60 or 70 and have gone on to flourish because that's what they wanted to do. But because of family and friends suppressing them or having an opinion, which families do and friends do, you know, it took them, they felt like it took them a longer time to encourage themselves.

[00:18:31] Angela Stewart: Something that I find really interesting in the, when I hit 50 was my beginning year of personal development. I'm really looking into this and understanding. Why we even do things or don't do things. So in the beginning, you're given a box frame as a child. Your parent has to raise you, hopefully with some sort of morals.

[00:18:55] Some sort of preservation, some sort of, um, enough, [00:19:00] um,

[00:19:04] belief in self to troubleshoot if one needs to. Yes. Yeah. Let's say that is the perfect framework. Mm hmm. Now, let's say you have parents who simply believe that their, uh, way is correct, their way is right. And that's how you've been taught, trained, educated, reinforced, reinforced, reinforced. Even though they're out of the picture, which for me was around my 30s.

[00:19:29] It took me that other 20 years of almost like going through, uh, PTSD type symptoms. 

[00:19:35] Savia Rocks: Yes. 

[00:19:36] Angela Stewart: Yeah. Where, um, I would, the fleas, do you know that, that, that, um, that experiment where they put fleas in the box? 

[00:19:44] Savia Rocks: Yep. 

[00:19:45] Angela Stewart: Where you're hitting a wall and that there's no actual wall there, but your own mindset, your own self consciousness is saying, okay, that's it.

[00:19:55] Back you go. I can't do this because blah, blah, blah. Um, Yeah. [00:20:00] It's not even a case of saying, um, my mother won't approve. Suddenly your mom's voice has merged into your own and you're saying, Oh, can't do that. 

[00:20:11] Savia Rocks: That's the mental impact. Oh my God. That's what I call it. I call it the mental impact. And until you.

[00:20:18] Cleanse yourself away from the mental impacts of their insecurities and narratives that they have in their mind that they have inflicted onto you because of their insecurities and a problem with parents or role models or siblings that have grown you up. What they do is those insecurities that they have, they're too focused on.

[00:20:41] What other people are saying and doing, and we'll say about you and we'll say about them about teaching you to be free within yourself. So what they do is they put you in a box and then they say, you're only allowed to do this, this, this, and this. If you go and do this one, you're going to go straight [00:21:00] to this one.

[00:21:01] And mentally in your mind, you have that surprise. And it's funny because we always keep the negative thing in our mind. 

[00:21:11] Angela Stewart: It stays more 

[00:21:12] Savia Rocks: for far greater than the 50 positive things about breaking free and doing what we want to do in order for us to be ourselves. And that's one thing I love saying to people is that you can't live in your mother or father's life.

[00:21:33] It's your life. But. the greatest key is now that you've been through what you've been through, I hope, and I'm sure you have shown your children that there is another way. 

[00:21:51] Angela Stewart: 100 percent. Of course, that requires you waking up. 

[00:21:55] Savia Rocks: Exactly. 

[00:21:56] Angela Stewart: You're just repeating. 

[00:21:57] Savia Rocks: Exactly. 

[00:21:59] Angela Stewart: Yeah. At [00:22:00] some point I was able to stand back enough to realize that my kids were suffering.

[00:22:06] Um, they were suffering because I was not even repeating. What my parents, the restrictions my parents were doing. My husband and I went to great pains because we both came from challenging childhood. 

[00:22:22] Savia Rocks: Yeah. 

[00:22:22] Angela Stewart: I can 

[00:22:23] Savia Rocks: only imagine. Yeah. 

[00:22:24] Angela Stewart: And, uh, so we already knew what they were not going to have to deal with, but invariably because we also hadn't dealt with our own individually, we were actually putting them under a different type of stress.

[00:22:36] Yes. Yeah. Yeah. So we had a bit to overcome. Um, and then I realized how much I personally, because as much as you want to be a unit, only you can take care of yourself. It's true. I can't hand that over to my husband. I couldn't hand it over to my parents. I can't hand it over to my doctors. I can't hold over to my pastor or my religious leader or [00:23:00] whatever.

[00:23:01] It's me. Yeah, it's me, my responsibility. And when, um, I won't lie, when I figured that if I didn't do something, I wasn't going to be around for much longer, 

[00:23:14] Savia Rocks: then 

[00:23:15] Angela Stewart: I had to take responsibility because I could see my girls there and I knew that they were going to have so much to deal with. 

[00:23:22] Savia Rocks: Yeah. 

[00:23:23] Angela Stewart: Um, my mom, I believe is still alive, still alive.

[00:23:27] She's still around. And, um, I was left to deal with it myself. My father passed maybe 20, 30 years ago. Um, and my relationship with my mom was not one in which I could go and say, Hey, I'm suffering. 

[00:23:41] Savia Rocks: Oh, tell me about it. 

[00:23:43] Angela Stewart: So I had to deal with it. Um, and as much as my, my husband, my partner, my soulmate, my everything, as much as he tried to help, he couldn't.

[00:23:57] And if I didn't take care of it, it was [00:24:00] going to destroy everything. So I had to sort myself out and the moment I did that, uh, oh my God, so, so, so grateful, so, so grateful. I could see my daughters, whatever position they were stuck in, they suddenly went, 

[00:24:20] Savia Rocks: yeah, like a break of freedom. 

[00:24:23] Angela Stewart: Oh my God. And as far as I'm concerned, now I know from never, nevermind the mistakes.

[00:24:33] I made as a young parent, but now I know that they, if they have to, they can look back at that objectively and they can see where they are now and know what they can do now to move forward. Because I can't change the past. All I can do is take responsibility for it. They are aware of that. And if, as you know, children do not listen to a word you say.[00:25:00] 

[00:25:03] Until it's too late. 

[00:25:03] Savia Rocks: I should have listened to my parents, you 

[00:25:05] Angela Stewart: know, if you're lucky, yeah, but what they do do is they watch you. They watch you and they learn from what you do. Everything, even if it wasn't a parent situation, whoever raised you, you observed more and took in more than you realized. Yeah, it's literally subconscious.

[00:25:27] Suddenly you're, like, there's this old story of, of how, um, uh, a wife used to cut the meatloaf and nicely present it on the table or whatever, the, the, the steak, the roll of beef or whatever. And, um, The husband asked her one day, why do you cut the ends off? Um, it's very nice, but why do you cut the ends off?

[00:25:50] She said, you know, I don't know. I'm going to ask my mom. She asked her mom. She said, I don't know. My mom always used to ask my mom. So I asked the grandmother now, [00:26:00] our great grandmother. And she said, well, the dish I had was too long. So I used to cut the ends off. So it would fit, but it had become a family tradition, right?

[00:26:09] Now I'm retelling something that's been told. So this People who have been to the training I've been to would know this story. There you go. You do things and you don't even know why you do it. So yeah, you observe. It's not because mom said, this is how you do it and it looks nice. It's because she's always done it.

[00:26:27] That's why you do it. 

[00:26:28] Savia Rocks: Yeah. So 

[00:26:29] Angela Stewart: I have learned to be very careful with what I do. Um, because they're watching and since I freed myself, not only have I seen them flourish in what they do, but if they need to, they can come and say, Hey mom, and that for me is like the greatest blessing because I know I can't do that to mine.

[00:26:50] Savia Rocks: I think, I think, I think some of the greatest things that I've ever done to set myself free from my parents and I'm very open about it. Is, [00:27:00] is I wrote a letter to them, they're still alive, I wrote a letter to them and, um, in that letter, I just articulated how I felt because for me, being a writer is one of the most powerful things that you can do in a form of expressing your emotions.

[00:27:24] So being able to write, and you don't have to give it to them, it's not that the letter is just for YouTube. To let it 

[00:27:30] Angela Stewart: out. Yeah. 

[00:27:31] Savia Rocks: Yeah. Let it out. And you, and you have many different forms. You can, you can post it to yourself. You can do loads of different things, but it's, it's about just getting it out. And that's a form or you can spiritually cleanse yourself by, you know, blessing yourself to get rid.

[00:27:49] But when we were born, I was told when we were born, we were born with seven generations of trauma within us. 

[00:27:57] Angela Stewart: I can believe that. 

[00:27:59] Savia Rocks: [00:28:00] And, and sometimes I always thought to myself, why do I have a pain in my back? Or why do I, why is, why am I feeling this way? Or am I in path because I'm feeling the emotions of everyone else around me?

[00:28:14] And it's just So when you get more spiritually aware of things that you've seen, like you said, but also things that you were born with, Oh my gosh, things that you were born with and understanding where they came from. You can, if you want to get rid of them, you can, if you want to, or you can use them as a form of strength to, to like you do with your daughters.

[00:28:47] And I think that's a beautiful thing. I think even though I am going to ask you this next question, I feel like you've told me a high majority of it, but sometimes in asking the question, something [00:29:00] beautiful pops out. 

[00:29:01] Angela Stewart: Okay. Okay. 

[00:29:02] Savia Rocks: So I'm going to ask you, can you define yourself as a person and who do you see when you look in the mirror?

[00:29:08] But on the flip side of that question, has there ever been a time you have looked in the mirror and not recognize the person staring back at you? How did you manage to go from a person that you may not have liked seeing the reflection of to becoming the person who you are happy with and know that this is the person that you want to become?

[00:29:31] Angela Stewart: Okay, give me the first part of that question again. 

[00:29:37] Savia Rocks: Can you define yourself as a person?

[00:29:45] Angela Stewart: Yeah, I try to simplify it into three words. Um,[00:30:00] 

[00:30:01] Honest. Mm hmm. Kind. Mm hmm. Loyal. 

[00:30:07] Savia Rocks: I like that. That's good enough for me. And then the next part of the question is, who do you see when you look in the mirror? 

[00:30:16] Angela Stewart: Now? 

[00:30:17] Savia Rocks: Mm hmm. 

[00:30:18] Angela Stewart: I see me. 

[00:30:21] Savia Rocks: Next part of the question. What does your reflection say about you when you say you see yourself? The next part of the question is, has there ever been a time when you have looked in the mirror and not recognized the person staring back at you?

[00:30:38] Angela Stewart: Yes, that particular episode, maybe, um, age wise, I'm nearly 60, well, 56, come February I turned 50, and more than half of my life, I didn't recognize the person I saw, didn't [00:31:00] like the person I saw, and coming, I would say, like I said, 50 was my turning point, so maybe the last 10 years, I didn't even want to look in, um.

[00:31:13] Not saying anything negative about my mom right now, but as my mom was my main focus The worst case scenario for me was when I looked in the mirror and thought I saw my mom I was not happy. I was not happy and that's physically. Um, I wasn't happy I didn't see the person I thought I was And coming to the end of my 40s, um, like I said, uh, uh, you know, if my family, uh, my immediate family, my children, my husband listened to this, I hope it doesn't distress them but they know the situation, um, coming to that point.

[00:31:58] Um, the [00:32:00] unhappiness I saw in the mirror, you know what it's like, it's the word mastercised, you know, when it becomes a physical problem. 

[00:32:09] Savia Rocks: Yes. 

[00:32:11] Angela Stewart: I had developed arthritis. I had developed, um, secondary problems to that arthritis because of course I was taking tablets. I was leaning heavily on a walking stick.

[00:32:22] I believed, I believed, I believed I was ill. I believed, I believed, I believed there was something wrong with my mind, I believed I had ADHD, I believed I had, what else was there, um, not dementia, what was the other one? I must have been Asperger's. I, I, everything because I felt my mind wasn't working and so I won't, well, you know, it depends on one's belief.

[00:32:46] I know mine. Um, merely because of my experiences, uh, so I'm not just saying I believe, I believe. I know because not only did I have those things, I saw it come and create and [00:33:00] develop. I also reversed it and removed it. 

[00:33:02] Intro Music: Yes. 

[00:33:03] Angela Stewart: I don't have arthritis anymore. I have to be careful. Yeah, sure. Because, you know, everything leaves scars and problems.

[00:33:10] But via MRI, I know that it's not there. Yeah, so the rest of it is now mindset. Yes Taking care of oneself. Yeah, so um I had Disliked the person I was so much that I, I didn't want to see that person, um, that by this time, I think the, the complete disconnection and disassociation had passed and I was merely existing, um, and, uh, how I turned it around, like I said, So many people say this and I don't think people realize the power in it is when you stop looking at yourself.

[00:33:54] Yes, you've got to take care of yourself. When you stop looking at yourself and try to care for somebody else, [00:34:00] that shifts your desire, if you like, for life and for health. And I can't actually remember what it was. That actually triggered it, but in the back of my mind was this niggling knowledge that my daughters were going to struggle, they were going to struggle and If I succeeded and removing myself from this plane of existence, how are they going to cope?

[00:34:29] If I love them, why would I do that to them? So it's like my mind was going like, you know, you're causing them bigger pain than if I would smack them. I'm causing them mental pain. It's really hard for someone to get over by themselves. 

[00:34:43] Savia Rocks: Yeah. 

[00:34:44] Angela Stewart: Um, and I can't sit there and say, okay, girls, you know, this is this and this and this and this and this.

[00:34:48] Like I said, talking doesn't really help. Yeah. And if they've got a mind block and they're all not a mind block if they're already thinking to themselves Well, you know, I'm really looking after herself. How can she tell me how to? [00:35:00] You know how to take care of my mental health and I can see she's suffering, you know, so I took steps To take care of myself, um, it wasn't even that cut and dry, I just thought to myself, Hell, I'm gonna be 50 next year!

[00:35:19] You 

[00:35:21] Intro Music: know what? 

[00:35:23] Angela Stewart: I'm gonna do something for me, darn it! 

[00:35:27] Savia Rocks: It's about that, yep, yep, I agree. It 

[00:35:31] Angela Stewart: was entirely selfish, but I'm telling you what, it was the best decision I'd ever made. It's like, the last. Six years nearly seven years has been the golden years best years of my life the best years of my family's life We have lived we have lived we have lived we have loved and expressed ourselves I'm sure I'm not saying I've done everything opened all the removed all [00:36:00] the Not even, not remove the pain, but I'm sure I've not opened all the doors to be able to discuss all the pain, but I know that they are in a place where, um, especially my youngest, where they can say, you know what?

[00:36:15] Um, I never understood this. I had a really frank conversation with dad and he's let me know that this has happened and that has happened and it's really changed my viewpoint on on where things have started and I appreciate you allowing me to speak about it because I'm not saying that I'm like, I am human.

[00:36:32] It hurts knowing that I caused that particular um, action or thought or pain. It hurts knowing that ultimately the cause was me, 

[00:36:47] Intro Music: even 

[00:36:47] Angela Stewart: if I was just completely. Um, cut off from reality and not looking to see what sort of ripples I was putting out. It hurts. You know, realization is not a [00:37:00] beautiful thing, but in the, the Buddhist mindset, I have to accept all sensation, all feeling, all action.

[00:37:10] It helps me to accept responsibilities. Nothing saying that it's not going to hurt, but at least I'm not trying to defend it because then I could be more causing even more hurt. 

[00:37:19] Savia Rocks: Yes. 

[00:37:20] Angela Stewart: Yeah. So, I've, I've seen the changes happening, um, that's how I changed it around. I, I didn't say I'm going to try and focus on my daughters, that didn't help.

[00:37:32] I removed my blockages first, and then they could see that they were able to talk to me. And then that caused something else to happen, which caused something else to happen, which caused something else to happen, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that dominoes effect. 

[00:37:46] Savia Rocks: Yeah, it's that ripple effect that happens.

[00:37:49] Angela Stewart: I, I think if someone sat there and said, Angela, this is what you need to do, I probably wouldn't have believed them and wouldn't know where to start. Um, I believe there is a point in everyone's life where they just simply say, this [00:38:00] can't go on. 

[00:38:00] Savia Rocks: Yes. Enough is enough. 

[00:38:02] Angela Stewart: Yeah. 

[00:38:03] Savia Rocks: It's like finding that courage point like Superman.

[00:38:06] Angela Stewart: Yeah. Yeah. In a way you have to not get to that point where you don't care for anyone else. That's 

[00:38:13] Savia Rocks: a dangerous point. 

[00:38:14] Angela Stewart: I 

[00:38:16] Savia Rocks: think that's one of the most dangerous points and I hope everyone finds their Superman point before they find that I don't care point. Because that in itself can cause a ripple effect and sometimes there's no going back from it.

[00:38:29] So, so I'm a big fan of finding your superman point or your superwoman point. There is no gender on super, but just finding your point that will levitate you to point where you're like. This is who I am, that I'm happy in this place, I feel relieved, I feel powerful, I feel I am somebody, which everyone is, but it just takes time for people to realize that they are that somebody.

[00:38:58] Angela Stewart: And it's not because of [00:39:00] any outside validation, it's just because they have the right to be there. That's all. 

[00:39:04] Savia Rocks: That's literally all it is. 

[00:39:06] Angela Stewart: Did I answer your question? 

[00:39:08] Savia Rocks: You sure did. 

[00:39:09] Angela Stewart: Hey, cool. You sure did. 

[00:39:12] Savia Rocks: So I'm going to talk about hair now. So I'm a big fan of hair. I'm a big fan of watching people do, I find it fascinating.

[00:39:21] Maybe I'm a bit of a nerd, but I find loads, I find technology fascinating. I find history fascinating. I find culture, writing, photography. I find all these things fascinating. 

[00:39:34] Angela Stewart: Wide range of interests. Okay. 

[00:39:37] Savia Rocks: Life and, and the most beautiful thing is, is that. I always love education, but even if I don't like someone's opinion or perspective on things, it's giving them the right to have the opinion to say it.

[00:39:52] I find that also really beautiful as well, because even if two people do not agree, there is something that we both can learn from each other. 

[00:39:59] Angela Stewart: [00:40:00] 100%. 

[00:40:01] Savia Rocks: And I, and I carry that. So my question for you is being an educator of hair and I've heard your story from where it began. Talk to me about the importance of culture and our ancestry when it comes to hair.

[00:40:16] I feel that as generations go by, some of our ancestry about culture and our hair is lost because not every generation understands the culture of hair. and how our hair is and how it should be and how social media plays a huge part in how they think our hair should, could and has to be. I know this is a big question, but, but to help the next generation or even people in our generations understand the importance about history and hair.

[00:40:49] Hmm. 

[00:40:52] Angela Stewart: Um, not sure where to start with this. Um,[00:41:00] 

[00:41:01] when, when I'm teaching, um, or when I decided to coach Afro hair and specifically the title, I don't want to, I am an Afro hair educator. Yes. Um, I don't teach Afro hair styling. because Afro hair care and maintenance is more important. And as part of that, the styling comes into it. I was speaking to a colleague, um, a little while back, and she's aware that I run these classes.

[00:41:36] I'm as a makeup artist, I teach other makeup artists. I also teach hairstylists. I also teach family members because of what I realize is possible that my mom's experience taught her how to handle hair, in which case. And it has borne out that either we're taught the wrong way or we're not taught at all.

[00:41:58] And this, [00:42:00] what's the societal images around us, we think that it needs to be this. And if it's not this, then it's going to be difficult, including the language that is used. We have to detangle our hair, we have to do this, we have to do that. use X amount of things to make it soft, to make it, um, uh, uh, uh, or that the, um, visual sites of our hair, if it shrinks, Oh my God, the shrinkage, the shrinkage, what's wrong with your hair shrinking?

[00:42:30] It's actually, it's natural state. Um, and there are plenty of images out there of women who have, my hair is forced C to try to give a broad indication, which everyone's aware of now the categories. I have seen people with tighter curls than mine, whose hair comes down like past their shoulders. Yes. 

[00:42:51] Savia Rocks: Yeah.

[00:42:51] Angela Stewart: Right? So we have this thing about length. It's got nothing to do really with any blackness and more to do with the fact that we're in a Western [00:43:00] society. Where straight and lengthened hair or big soft bouncy curls is the standard of beauty. Yeah. So I teach not only my colleagues, so that they're the people in the TV and film industry who come in to contact them and photographic industry who come in to contact them have a more, uh, humane, let's use that word, experience of having their hair styled, um, or, um, cared for in whatever fashion, you The thing requires, um, but I also teach parents because I'm aware that either they had no experience themselves or had a negative experience.

[00:43:41] And like most people with very painful hair experiences, they simply disassociate from it. There's no feeling from the forehead up. Yeah. They either going to expect pain. I've been in situations where people simply say, um, yeah, uh, don't worry, you can go harder. 

[00:43:59] Intro Music: Yeah. Uh huh. 

[00:43:59] Angela Stewart: [00:44:00] No, no, no. I'm used to it. Tug. Tug.

[00:44:02] It's fine. It's fine. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. That's not acceptable. And you should not be used to that. You know, you should not be used to that. But this is the norm. I can't even remember the question now. So you're going to have to remind me. I told you I'm going to go over the tangent. And what was it you were saying?

[00:44:17] Um, why is it important? 

[00:44:20] Savia Rocks: Yeah. Why is it important to teach the culture of hair and in society why it's lost? 

[00:44:25] Angela Stewart: Right. Let me try and condense it. One, it's important because it's our heritage. 

[00:44:29] Savia Rocks: Yeah. 

[00:44:30] Angela Stewart: All right. And the way society, um, in all its images and all its products, oh my God, walking into an Afro here.

[00:44:37] It's like, what? Very confusing. Um, it's important to understand that we need none of these things. It's also important because, um,

[00:44:53] it's so, I, I have to be careful, I don't want to get you like into trouble. 

[00:44:57] Savia Rocks: You can never get me into trouble, my dear, I'm about breaking [00:45:00] boundaries all the time. 

[00:45:00] Angela Stewart: Okay, fine. Then let's talk truth about the products that are in, uh, the, the, the chemicals that are in some of the, you know, that was my next question.

[00:45:08] Ah, okay. So this is why heritage is important. We think that to see our natural curls is a problem. So we use things to, um, Make it appear straighter, but these things especially the general store boughtness The reason why there's so much choice out there is because it then gets mass produced And then it if you want to view it the way I do it's a delivery system put stuff into our bodies because remember we're not in our own environment as in a black country a black society So, um, we have to, I don't want to say look at it as a hostile environment, but we have to be aware that we can't believe what someone is giving us as being good for our health, especially as there is documented [00:46:00] evidence, even if though it might be suppressed, that these things, uh, mess, uh, is the word endocrine system?

[00:46:08] Yes, that's correct. A hormone. Yes. Yeah? It, it, we, our skin, including our scalp, absorbs. Even more so. It absorbs the chemicals, exactly. And, and then it gets trapped into our system and then we can't do anything about it. Yeah? It then develops into a cancer or, um, into fibroids or into a difficulty to have in children or even to, uh, what's the other one, ear.

[00:46:35] Endometriosis. Yeah, all of these things, I cannot, and it's not just the hair products, but because we're talking about hair, that's where I'm going to stop it. It's also our food. If you're not making the food yourself, you have no idea what they've got in there as a preservative. No idea. 

[00:46:51] Savia Rocks: That's why I want to farm in the middle of nowhere.

[00:46:55] That's the goal. The farm in the middle of nowhere. 

[00:46:58] Angela Stewart: Hear that. So this is [00:47:00] why the education is so important. On top of that, if anyone had an experience like me, which I know they did, I'm going to take it as my, yours and my experience as being the general experience. Not everybody, but the general experience.

[00:47:17] that you disassociate from your hair and do everything to make your hair, um, uh, be something else that you idolize someone with different types of hair. You're actually damaging your own mental health. This is mental health in action that you are reinforcing as you go that without speaking, you pass on to your child.

[00:47:40] I've been in situations where I've had women with, um, Their own hair has been, they're either wearing a wig or have their hair in plaits or something. The more advanced ones would have their hair in plaits. Usually it's either a wig or their hair has been relaxed. A four year old girl, four year old girl, hair relaxed.[00:48:00] 

[00:48:00] The front ends have been broken off because all the mum does is brushes it back into a, into a ponytail. I said, oh, is, is her, cause as in my job, I, I know what it is. I have to have a conversation with the parent as I would if the person was an adult. Oh, is your hair relaxed? Oh, have you straightened your hair?

[00:48:19] Is it with heat? You know, so that we're having that conversation. I can assess it and I can see, I am determined that that person Um, not only takes responsibility for what they've done or who they've done it to if it's not themselves but also so that I'm trying to make them think, you know, I'm not in a position where I'm like, yeah, I'm the expert.

[00:48:41] I'll do it. Don't worry. Off you go. Right. I asked the mother, is her hair straightened or like with the heat thing or is it relaxed? She goes, Oh no, it's relaxed. I went, Oh. How old is she? Four years old. Oh, not, not, actually, I can't say that bit. In my head, I'm [00:49:00] thinking, is that not too young? But I didn't need to say anything because the mum came up with the excuse.

[00:49:05] Oh, well, you know, she, and where this people of African descent, so their hair was curlier, tighter than mine. So they think it's harder. Usually their hair is stronger than mine. It's beautiful here, but they just don't know how to soften it enough to be able to manipulate it. So, um, she goes, Oh yeah, well, she, she fusses when I comb it.

[00:49:26] So I just relax it. Not, not a lot, just texturize it, just texturize it. And I said, right. Okay. So she had like about an inch where it was maybe about, You could see the curls because the hair had broken off where the new hair had grown. 

[00:49:42] Savia Rocks: Yeah. 

[00:49:42] Angela Stewart: Right. And then there was this very hard, stiff upper part. So time being as it was, all I could do was somewhat soften the thing that the upper part of the hair.

[00:49:54] And she said, Oh, I don't, don't worry about the front. You know, that's, that's broken off. And I said, no, no, no, it's very [00:50:00] easy to do. So I put a little bit of water on, got some olive oil, which I always carry in my kit. Brush that on and then gently brush the hair backwards. Child didn't fuss, child barely looked sideways, nothing.

[00:50:13] It was all smoothed out, um, I obviously couldn't use heat or anything to straighten it out, which I wouldn't have done but it was brushed out and so it wasn't no longer like in its own little broken off bit that looks as though you don't want to associate with it, you know, like I'm saying, inside this child has learned not to fuss with her hair or that her hair is, I've met adults who say like, you know, they're in their 20s before they start to relax in their hair.

[00:50:41] Because relaxed hair is all they knew, but now they don't know how to deal with their hair, yeah? And this mum was training her child to be that way. And all I could see was the problem restarting, restarting all the time. Re coming back up, coming back up, and why? Because [00:51:00] mum, in this case, didn't want to know.

[00:51:03] Intro Music: Yeah. 

[00:51:03] Angela Stewart: In most cases, they simply don't know, so they can't pass on anything, uh, to their child. Anything, um Oh. That builds that child's self-esteem. They're always on the back foot. They're always trying to fix their hair. They're always trying to fit in. They always think they need to fit in. So it's, it's their own voice.

[00:51:23] We're going right back to what we started. Now, 

[00:51:25] Savia Rocks: the 

[00:51:26] Angela Stewart: imposter of our conversation, they, they think that they can't look at themselves because they don't like what they see. They put on tons of makeup, they try to lighten their skin, they straighten their hair, they wear wigs with this.

[00:51:42] Savia Rocks: I've seen it all, believe me. I've seen, I've seen it all. 

[00:51:45] Angela Stewart: And I, I, you know, it is a style choice. One of the wonderful things about our, our hair and our heritage. Is we can put things in our hair, we can cover our hair, we can straighten our hair, we can leave our hair curly, whatever. We [00:52:00] can put it in locks, we can put it in plaits, we can restyle it.

[00:52:02] This is the beautiful versatility of our hair type, but they don't know this and they're stuck in this one position of trying to be someone else which is bound to cause a problem in their psyche. So, yes, I think Afro hair education is really important. I'm a coach because I'd like to teach people how to, I'd like to change their mindset on how first of all, they think about Afro hair.

[00:52:30] Is it hard? Well, actually, no. Do you use water? Well, no, because I'm trying to keep it straight. Well, actually, you're is it, is it fragile? No, it's actually extremely strong, but only in its natural state. Let me show you how to get it to its natural straight state. And let me show you how to handle it without using a comb, without using a brush.

[00:52:50] They are tools, therefore making straight lines. If that's what you want. Well, you don't have to comb out your hair. You've been taught [00:53:00] how to care for your hair Using a method that is not designed for your hair. 

[00:53:05] Savia Rocks: That is very true 

[00:53:07] Angela Stewart: So that's that's my little soapbox. That's that's what I'm trying to do.

[00:53:12] I'm trying to make a difference I'm trying to change as the majority of the world have some form of curly hair I am trying to get them to change their viewpoint at least as They have to step away, nothing is instant, especially if you've spent ages trying to straighten ones here and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

[00:53:32] It's dehydrated. It's going to take some time for the cuticles to be able to open up and for it to go back into its natural state. 

[00:53:38] Savia Rocks: You know, it's funny that you say that. So I'm so glad you did. The first thing I'm going to say to you is that you're not trying. You are making a difference. So humbly always say you are making a difference.

[00:53:51] That's just from me. And the second thing is before I got married, my hair, I used to straighten my hair and this is a good example [00:54:00] as well, but when I was putting it to his natural state, which it is now nice and curly, I noticed that I would wash my hair and just use aloe vera. in my hair, like this natural plant aloe vera in my hair.

[00:54:13] Um, and, and for me, I was like, I was, it felt like heaven because it was like, Oh, this feels good. And then, but I noticed the bottom of my hair was still straight. Like, because it was, it felt dead is like it was dead. So I had to nurture those parts of my hair more and I wasn't using a comb. I was actually just using my hands and just, and I realized, and I realized how much of a difference it, it made.

[00:54:45] So now, so now when I wear my big hair, I, you see my head before you see me and then you see my dungarees cause I love wearing dungarees. And then. But I always say to people, it's, [00:55:00] listen, the most painful thing I've ever been through is perming my hair. It's painful. Yeah. It's not even, I know I'm laughing now, right, Angela?

[00:55:11] But it's painful. Yeah. And it's not even 10 minutes. It's not even 10 minutes. That thing sits in your hair. 

[00:55:18] Angela Stewart: Yeah. 

[00:55:19] Savia Rocks: And, and I'm like, 

[00:55:20] Angela Stewart: in your, if you're a hair type, it should not have been in that long. It really shouldn't. Just saying. 

[00:55:29] Savia Rocks: But you know this. Listen, when, when you're sitting on the seat and your mother puts the perm and you're like, Oh mom, it's hurting me.

[00:55:36] Mom, it's hurting me. And then your mom's like, no, it's not ready yet. What do you mean it's not ready? It feels like a string. And then they take it out. And even my friends were like, why were you perming your hair? And it just felt like I was being tortured. I'm being honest. I'm just letting it out there.

[00:55:53] Angela Stewart: Yeah. Yeah. 

[00:55:54] Savia Rocks: Because I don't want someone else to have to go through that same type of torture. Listen, [00:56:00] please don't perm your hair, people. I'm just saying it. I'm sure Angela would agree with me, but she's allowed to have her opinion. 

[00:56:05] Angela Stewart: There is too much you can do with your natural hair. You can have it straight when you want it.

[00:56:09] Say for example, I was doing, um, the Goodwood Revival, uh, Beginning of this month and usually I either have my hair in plaits or the last couple of years I've been leaving it exactly as it is now and it's effectively wash and go style in its natural curl and I would corkscrew it to change its texture and create different styles.

[00:56:31] This time I decided I was going to use a straightener, um, so, um, GHD is a straightening 

[00:56:37] Intro Music: tool 

[00:56:38] Angela Stewart: and I used that because I knew it was going to be very wet that weekend. I also used like a serum, like a heat serum, like if you're doing a stock press, which I usually tell other people not to do. So I put it on thinking, okay, this is going to keep the hair, the moisture away from my hair.

[00:56:58] So it's not going to revert as much. Got [00:57:00] through my weekend. No worries at all. Came home and I thought, right, okay, it's time to, for it to go back to normal. I was disappointed to see how extended my hair was. And I'm like, okay, okay. You know, you're a coach. You knew this was going to happen. It's all right.

[00:57:14] It's all right. You're doing fine. It's going to go back and it did. It's still not 100 percent back. The sides are back to normal, but the top is still a little bit, um, extended. Well, I can see my curls and I know that they're going to come back. So yeah, 

[00:57:28] Savia Rocks: we'll come back. 

[00:57:31] Angela Stewart: I hear is so versatile. Straighten it if you want.

[00:57:34] Platter if you want. Rest it and put a wig on if you want. Please. No chemical. It's unnecessary. And watch what you're putting on your hair. These, um, they, what do they call them? Begins with a K. Kera, Kera, Kera something. Can't think of the name right now. But there's like, and they tell you that if you use a blow [00:58:00] drying, um, thing, it's not as harsh as, uh, relaxers.

[00:58:05] Um, I can't think of the name. It's completely gone from my head. But there is a serum you can put on your hair, almost like silk press, I guess. But the fact that you're using heat to, uh, to seal down the cuticles means that you are even in a soft fashion, changing almost permanently your curl pattern. Um, with mine, I knew I didn't do it too much, so I knew it would come back.

[00:58:30] Um, but there are some people who have used, um, other treatments, which, um, You know, they're, they're saying all this, they said it was only going to last six months and you know, the ends of my hair is still straight, but the upper part is now curly. That's exactly what 

[00:58:43] Savia Rocks: happened. Ah, 

[00:58:45] Angela Stewart: right. So it's like, no, just, just avoid it.

[00:58:48] Learn how to care for your hair by yourself, um, best thing you can do. If you choose to do that, okay, fine afterwards, but know how to care for it first. And then decide if [00:59:00] 

[00:59:01] Savia Rocks: I love that. So let's talk about makeup. Yeah. I find makeup a source of creativity within art, being able to do it on people's faces or bodies or wherever you decide to do it.

[00:59:15] So please talk to me about how you become creative with an art within makeup. 

[00:59:24] Angela Stewart: Um,

[00:59:28] well that's really interesting. Uh, it's an interesting question because I would not class myself as Um, a fashion makeup artist, I, even though I wear like very bright clothes, I wouldn't necessarily. No, I like that. That's the photo. 

[00:59:45] Savia Rocks: That's cool. 

[00:59:47] Angela Stewart: I wouldn't, um, I, I'm not one who goes for really bold makeup.

[00:59:53] I like makeup that is natural. That is enhancing. Um, but as you can [01:00:00] see, I don't wear makeup. Um, I do see it as a tool. I get women who, uh, you know, everyone's stuck in their own mental blocks. I know people who don't go to the sweet shop unless they've got at least eyebrows on or eyeliner. I've got to put foundation on even if they do nothing else.

[01:00:21] And I'm thinking about, you know, if I'm in a job where someone has been asked not to wear makeup and they come in. And they've got makeup on, which I now have to take off or try to work on top of, because we have time restriction. And I asked them why they, or weren't they not told. not to wear any. Like, oh yeah, but you know, I had to come up on the train and you know, so many people I'm going to see.

[01:00:45] And I said, how many of them did you know? They go, oh, they don't know you. They're not going to judge you. 

[01:00:55] Savia Rocks: And some of them find you more attractive in your natural form. 

[01:00:58] Angela Stewart: So beautiful. [01:01:00] Some of them are so beautiful, but they've gone for years, especially if they use the same makeup looks. I've had to, some women have asked me for, um, makeup, personal makeup classes.

[01:01:11] Because they're now in their 50s, but they're still using the same colors and method as they used when they were 18. 

[01:01:17] Savia Rocks: Okay. Um, so 

[01:01:18] Angela Stewart: they're like, okay, I need to learn how to do it. And it's usually because they've come in, had a session with me, um, for something else. Realized that I've used one, a fraction of the makeup and two, a tiny little bit here and there.

[01:01:30] And like, oh my God, my eyes are so much bigger. Oh my God, my brows are defined. And it's not this great big light brown. You know, arch, 

[01:01:38] Intro Music: or whatever, or brown, orange 

[01:01:40] Angela Stewart: arch, it's like, you know, and it's like, so, if I have been hired to do something that is very, uh, has a very specific brief, then I can let my creativity out.

[01:01:56] But otherwise, it's a case of, um, [01:02:00] enhancing only what I see. If it's for film or for photography, then I know that something specific comes out or has to be emphasized, then I focus on that. Um, how I can convert it from paper onto a face. So, um, I find that really interesting. Um, first time I did face painting.

[01:02:22] It felt very strange because the paper was warm. Yes. And so when I rested my hand on that, if it's a child, it's fine. You're, you're doing, you're doing it quite fast. But when it's an adult and say it was body painting, um, Oh, it's, it's a very interesting process because the medium, like I say, is warm. Um, and what you're in, in your mind's eye, you're overlaying your outcome onto this mobile and rounded surface to look as though it's either flat or, [01:03:00] you know, depending on what, what is you need to create.

[01:03:03] Um, that one was probably the biggest stretch for me. Um, and it was only after going through my makeup training that I realized I didn't necessarily like changing a person's face. I just liked enhancing it or showing them if, if they felt, you know, a little insecure about something or other, my words of, don't worry, your eyebrows are not meant to be exactly identical.

[01:03:27] Um, that's actually more strange than normal. So don't worry about that. So my words would reassure them. Um, showing them if they wanted to wear makeup, how they could enhance their looks themselves without completely changing who they are. It. It hurts my heart sometimes to see some of the Instagram stuff.

[01:03:47] Savia Rocks: Yeah. 

[01:03:48] Angela Stewart: If it, if it's just for that creative thing, then fine. But then they go out like that. Um, I remember seeing somebody, um, in one of our local shopping centers with this beautiful, the makeup [01:04:00] was magnificent. I'm not sure I could have done that. Everything was on, it was perfectly baked. It looked like a mask that you could lift off like this.

[01:04:08] Savia Rocks: Whoa. 

[01:04:08] Angela Stewart: Down to the beautiful gold highlights. With the point on the end of her nose and you know, we're in the middle of a shopping mall And I'm thinking, you know, if you're taking photographs if you're on a you know, take it on a photo shoot You're going to a party Yes But this was in the middle of the day and she obviously was just going to work or in a lunch break And I'm like that's too much makeup Skin's gonna suffer your psyche's gonna suffer, especially if that's the first and last thing you always do When you look at yourself in the mirror, you're not going to like who you see, you're not going to know who you're looking at, you know, so, wow, I'm going on a tangent again.

[01:04:49] Savia Rocks: No, I like, I like when people go on tangents because then it, then it's authentic and you know that that's how they feel about it. 

[01:04:57] Angela Stewart: This is how I feel, um, when I [01:05:00] get very young people, I've sort of tried and discouraged them. 

[01:05:03] Savia Rocks: See, one of the things, one of the things that I will say to you, Angela, is if I stripped away.

[01:05:09] everything, title, work title, mother title, you know, um, wife title. And I said, who is Angela when she is in just her thoughts? What would you say to me? 

[01:05:23] Angela Stewart: I don't know how to answer that. I mean, I know I, I felt like I did a cop out earlier when I said, I see me, I was hoping I would get away with that, but clearly not.

[01:05:34] Um, um, who do I see? Okay. I see the person that I would have wanted to be as an 18 year old. I see, I see someone who enjoys what she sees, enjoys [01:06:00] what she does. Who chooses what she does, who,

[01:06:10] I was going to say chooses who she interacts with, but that's, that's not it. As that Buddhist mindset I've come to understand and believe it or not, I was always like that as a younger person. but now I understand it more. Um, I accept everyone for who they are. Yes, I can choose who I spend my time with.

[01:06:37] That's not the same as saying, I'm going to avoid that person. If they're in my area, my room, in my workspace, I will treat them with as much kindness. Yes. Even if that kindness means. Not interacting with them because I see they might get triggered for whatever reason, whatever it is. I, I accept that. And so the person I [01:07:00] see is this.

[01:07:03] Okay. Why am I laughing? Okay, so you notice the clothes I wear, right? Right. Loud. 

[01:07:12] Savia Rocks: Hey, I'm in yellow. 

[01:07:14] Angela Stewart: Hey, true. Um, so I see myself as young. Independent, kind, reliable, honest. If I can do something, I'll do it. If I can't, if I said I would, then I'll come back to you and say, I can't do it because not to excuse, but to explain to you why, um, it's not going to happen.

[01:07:42] Not even that I let you down because my, my, my, um, trying to think of the right word, Any word, huh? My, um,

[01:07:58] my importance in [01:08:00] my own. health, personal health dictates that I do not get into a state of worry thinking that I've let you down. So if it wasn't going to happen, I would have emailed, messaged, whatever. For example, I had a, a zoom call yesterday afternoon for a coaching call evening for a coaching call.

[01:08:23] And in the morning I knew it was going to clash with something and I would be late, 

[01:08:28] Intro Music: but 

[01:08:28] Angela Stewart: I didn't want to let that person down. Because I know why they want to come to me for a coaching call, they need help, right? So in the morning, I said, I emailed saying there is a possibility that I will be five to ten minutes late, but I will be there.

[01:08:45] I will be there, but there is a possibility that I will be late and I wanted you to know so that you didn't think that I was missing the appointment. It turned out that the person couldn't make the appointment because she had her own family emergency. 

[01:08:59] Intro Music: I 

[01:08:59] Angela Stewart: [01:09:00] sat there for that half hour spate just in case she came into the Zoom call.

[01:09:05] I missed it in the evening because I had an early start today, but when I saw my emails this morning, it turned out, I think it was 9. something like that. She'd emailed saying, I'm so sorry, had a family emergency and I completely forgot to email you and let you know I couldn't make it. I was okay with that.

[01:09:22] I wasn't angry with her. I wasn't annoyed that I'd waited half an hour because to satisfy my Yes, peace of mind. I had set my boundaries and was prepared to give it whatever time was necessary. So I Feel that I am Young. I still feel like that 18 year old. I feel independent enough to choose how I wear my hair, even though sometimes creeps in, Oh, look at that one.

[01:09:50] It's standing out. I think, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's all good. And I can move on and I can get back to myself pretty quick. [01:10:00] Right? If I'm doing something with my daughters or if I'm busy with something, um, and they want to chat with me, if it's that time sensitive, I say, I've got to get this down. Let me finish this.

[01:10:11] I'll come back to you. I am open. I am honest with myself first, which means I actually give other people the respect they deserve. They know exactly where they stand. That is the person I see, and I am so happy with me. I, I can actually say I love me and without it being a sort of like, you know, egotistical, whatever.

[01:10:33] Savia Rocks: No, you're allowed to say it. 

[01:10:35] Angela Stewart: I am so at peace. I feel so balanced. So in the middle, even when I go off on a, on a spiral, which can happen when things suddenly everything seems to be going wrong, like getting on this, this zoom call. Um, I'm like, okay, take a breath, ask somebody, because you know, somebody else knows exactly what to do to troubleshoot.

[01:10:59] Tell you what, two [01:11:00] seconds my daughter had it sorted. But anyway, um, 

[01:11:03] Savia Rocks: She's like, come on mum, let's click, click. 

[01:11:06] Angela Stewart: I'm sure she's told me before, but anyway, um, but I can, I am able to not go so far that I, and this has been me. When I was younger, I'd pick up something and lob it at the wall. It's not working.

[01:11:21] And then, of course, you have to come back to yourself because you made a fool of yourself, either in front of other people or you've now broken your only mouse or something. Right. I don't have any of that now. So when I say I'm happy, I'm at peace. I'm balanced. If things do go astray. I can as quickly as possible take a breath or I can look at it and I think, eh, okay, you know what, it will turn up when I tidy up.

[01:11:46] I move away and believe it or not, that thing appears. So, um, this is me. 

[01:11:53] Savia Rocks: I like this. So I've only got two more for you and my second to last one is [01:12:00] if there was one song in the history of music, Oh, she's thinking if there was one song in the history of music that was the soundtrack of your life, what song would you choose and why would you choose that particular song?

[01:12:18] Angela Stewart: I knew I should have prepared properly. I forgot about this question. Um,

[01:12:35] I don't know if I can remember the name. It's an Earth, Wind and Fire song. Is it Stars

[01:12:44] Savia Rocks: Hold on. Hold on. Let me just, let me just go on my way. Let me help. I like this 

[01:12:51] Angela Stewart: one. Oh my gosh. Name's gone [01:13:00] from me. Um, there's power, 

[01:13:05] Savia Rocks: there's power light, there's September. There's not September. Hold on, let me find, they've got a lot of albums, dude. 

[01:13:16] Angela Stewart: It's on my playlist. It's on my playlist. I shouldn't know this.

[01:13:20] Savia Rocks: Okay. Let's go into one of that. Let's go into one of the albums and find out. So there's Paralight. In Paralight, there's fall in love with me. Spread your love side by side, uh, straight from the heart. Speed of love. Freedom of choice. Nope. Miracles. 

[01:13:42] Angela Stewart: Oh, look what I'm doing to you. I'm so sorry. 

[01:13:44] Savia Rocks: No, no, no. Let me see.

[01:13:46] There's, that's September. Everyone knows September. 

[01:13:49] Angela Stewart: Yeah.

[01:13:56] Savia Rocks: Uh, Shining Star? Yeah. Uh, [01:14:00] is that the one? 

[01:14:00] Angela Stewart: I think it's Shining Star. Can 

[01:14:02] Savia Rocks: you play it? Hold on. Yeah, 

[01:14:04] Angela Stewart: yeah, play it, play it. Uh, Star. It's simply called Star. Is it called Star? Hang on. Can I play it? Of course you can.

[01:14:18] Savia Rocks: That's the one. 

[01:14:19] Angela Stewart: Yeah? That's the one. That's my song. That will be it. See, that's gonna 

[01:14:24] Savia Rocks: go, that's gonna go in. You know the reason why I asked this question, right? No. That's the one. Because every season I do a playlist with everybody who's come on the show and I put their song into a playlist. It's pretty cool.

[01:14:38] And then I'm like, if you see, it's kind of a messed up playlist sometimes. Cause it would go from like earth, wind and fire. To Coldplay and then from Coldplay to Fleetwood Mac and then Fleetwood Mac to like Kiss. 

[01:14:55] Angela Stewart: Yes, playlists, man. I bet you every single one of those songs are in power in some [01:15:00] shape or form.

[01:15:00] No, 

[01:15:00] Savia Rocks: they are actually. And then like, it will go from like Kiss to Bob Marley. So and then, then Marcus Garver, there's so many, but it's such a cool thing to do because you get to learn a lot about how people view themselves through a song. Yeah. Which is such an inspiring thing to do. But my last question is, before I say thank you for coming on the show, I would love for everyone to know where they can find you, how they can find you.

[01:15:30] And if you would be happy to, to give any information out so people can contact you. 

[01:15:37] Angela Stewart: Yes. Okay. Um, well I'm on Instagram. Um, I am a makeup artist. Yes. Because my mission, I've decided in life is to help other people with makeup. understanding they're here, or people who, who's here, they have to care for, um, [01:16:00] to create this wholesome experience and empower from the, from the word go.

[01:16:05] In Instagram, I am afrohaircoach. You'll find all sorts in there, but mainly to do with my work. So it's either as a makeup artist, Um, or as primarily an Afro hair coach or educator, right? So that's that. Um, I am on, uh, Facebook as well. Um, I have a Facebook group called Afro, I remember, yeah, this is sad. Um, the Afro curly, Afro and curly hair movement.

[01:16:39] That's it. I call it the Afro and curly hair movement. Simplifying, signifying the movement of Afro here, um, and because I wanted to change people's viewpoint. It's, it's not, I'm not teaching styling. I want to teach you how to, how we can change the whole world's [01:17:00] viewpoint. So it's a movement. It's like a revolution.

[01:17:02] So that's that. 

[01:17:03] Savia Rocks: I like that. 

[01:17:04] Angela Stewart: Um, uh, I also have a website called AfroHairCoach. I wanted to keep it nice and simple so people can find me. There are other natural hair coaches out there for sure, um, but I believe I'm the only AfroHairCoach in Webland. So, um, you can find me there. Um, that is, um, it's a very simple website and just is a case of, um, showing my courses, one to one coaching or group coaching if necessary for TV, film, families.

[01:17:40] I also, also do community groups and stuff like that. So, um, that's how you can find me and I would more than welcome. Any contact, any question, 

[01:17:50] Savia Rocks: see 

[01:17:50] Angela Stewart: it along 

[01:17:51] Savia Rocks: and you know, this is where I say to you, thank you so much for first of all, coming on the show, I always say time is precious and a [01:18:00] beautiful thing.

[01:18:00] So when you share with people that makes it something even better. So thank you so much for taking your time to come on the show for showing your kindness, compassion, telling your story. In your way with no filter, but most of all helping to educate people from your perspective and then being open to other opinions and not being afraid to show pain and just being the natural existence of who you are.

[01:18:27] Thank you so much. 

[01:18:30] Angela Stewart: Beyond words. It's been an honor. 

[01:18:33] Savia Rocks: Thank you so much. And guys, I want to thank you so much for listening to the ask people podcast and please remember you can subscribe and leave us a review on Spotify, iTunes, Google play, and any other platform that you prefer listening to. You can also find me every Tuesday where we put out the ask people podcast for you to listen to.

[01:18:55] You can also connect with me every Thursday live. [01:19:00] Well, I have a new guest at 8 p. m. UK time, and you can also watch that on LCBN TV. You can also see that on Apple TV, Fire TV, Free Food Journal 271. And every Wednesday, we replay any podcast that you may have missed on Heart Songs Lives at 9 p. m. UK time.

[01:19:18] And as always, this is when I say the most important part. Thank you for listening. Stay happy. Stay positive and as always, please continue to be kind to one another. Take care guys.

[01:19:59] [01:20:00] How was it for you, okay? 

[01:20:01] Angela Stewart: It was so good. It was so good. It was, um, it was refreshing. It's lovely to talk, um, uninhibited, if I could say so. 

[01:20:13] Savia Rocks: Of course you can. 

[01:20:15] Angela Stewart: Uh, thank you for asking me some of those questions. Even though, yes, I know my story, um, it's nice to be able to share it. There was a time when, um, Due to everything that had happened in my early life, the last thing I wanted to do was the last thing.

[01:20:32] I just At all. So, um, I, I hope it was done in as humble a way as possible, but I realized The importance of sharing because otherwise people go through life thinking that they there's something wrong with them. 

[01:20:51] Savia Rocks: Yes. 

[01:20:52] Angela Stewart: They don't realize that it's actually a part of life. And this is what you're supposed to feel.

[01:20:58] This is what it's like, but you [01:21:00] don't have to react to it. There's nothing to do. Just say, ah, well this is what this feels like, and you add it to your experience and you go on.

[01:21:35] Savia Rocks: Spread your wings and let the wings fly like a superman. Like a superman. Spread your wings and let the wings fly like a superman. So fly like a [01:22:00] superman.